ABC: Always Be Chomping.
This episode of BearShark truly is our Citizen Kane (parody).
New BearShark!
I'm a writer/editor at Collegehumor.com
Dinosaur Office is a thing some friends and I made
I do the Twitter. You can ask me stuff
I live for adventure
contact: kevinjcorrigan at gmail Ask me anything
Dinosaur Office is a thing some friends and I made
I do the Twitter. You can ask me stuff
I live for adventure
contact: kevinjcorrigan at gmail Ask me anything
March 12, 2013
March 5, 2013
Last week, “Paperman” won the Oscar for Best Animated short, but they never showed the full, unedited ending. Here it is.
The O-Dogg and I wrote some erotic fan fiction about that award-winning Paperman short.
July 4, 2012
June 5, 2012
7 Quotes About Drugs or Baths
I’m reading about bath salts for a sketch I’m writing. I’ve noticed that, in reviews, people refer to tripping on bath salts as taking a bath. These are my seven favorite real quotes from real bath salt reviews.
- The euphoric effects begin pretty darn quick – say 10-15 minutes and escalate from there to produce one of the best baths on the planet, hands down.
- “You will be able to sleep 8+ hours after your bath and will have only mild effects the day after.”
- “The effects of Tranquility bath salts do not last as long as many of the others either, which is a plus for many people that don’t have a budget of 6-8 hours for a bath.”
- “We can also attest to an extreme state of clear-mindedness and ability to focus, if that is something that you wish to do while bathing.”
- “…with little in the way of after-effects, at least none that would make you want to forgo another bath sometime in the future.”
- “If not experienced, definitely start out with a little bit in the bath and see how things go.”
- “Just because it’s 50-State legal, doesn’t mean it’s a crappy bath.”
June 4, 2012
I never put two and two together before. Michelangelo’s suggested response for being offered marijuana is “get a pizza.”
June 1, 2012
Sketch Comedy for Dogs
Today is Bring your Dog to Work Day in the Collegehumor office. In honor of the occasion, I’ve written what I think is the first comedy sketch for dogs. If you don’t get it, it’s because you’re not a dog!
EXT. BACKYARD - DAY
GEORGE, a handsome German shepherd, paces the yard. He goes from object to object, smelling. No one spot catches his interest. He’s enamored with experiencing the whole world. George is investigating a tree stump when MISS WOOFOWITZ, a buxom boxer-basset hound mix, approaches. She coyly smells the stump, but pretends not to notice him. He’s tentative.
GEORGE
Bark.
Miss Woofowitz ignores him. She acts as though her attention has been enveloped by the stump.
GEORGE
Bark. Bark. Bark.
Miss Woofowitz’s ears go erect. She stairs deep into George’s eyes.
GEORGE
Bark. Bark.
Miss Woofowitz is taken back. She didn’t expect such a direct response, such confidence. She composes herself.
MISS WOOFOWITZ
Bark.
GEORGE
Bark. Bark.
MISS WOOFOWITZ
Bark. Bark.
GEORGE
Bark.
MISS WOOFOWITZ
Bark.
They stare each other down, then simultaneously lose interest. George discovers a tennis ball and licks it. His tongue is coated in the memories of the ball’s past. He tastes the grass of the lawn. He tastes the saliva of the other dogs that have held it. He tastes the skin flecks of his owner’s hand, left behind from nights spent throwing it. He tastes the cardboard and plastic package it was birthed from. The ball is as much round toy as it is a yearbook of flavors.
Miss Woofowitz shits.
END.
January 2, 2012
Dorky Bits: Zelda’s Boyfriend Mike
I decided the name Mike was really funny while I was writing this for some reason.
December 10, 2011
List of Cats
A little over a week ago I tweeted about a Wikipedia page called List of Cats. No, it’s not called List of Famous Cats. It’s called List of Cats. My mom’s cat George is a cat, so I added him to the list. I also encouraged other people to do the same if their cats were cats. A bunch of people did and they’re really funny! Here they are in case someone at Wikipedia decides these cats aren’t cats. But for right now, they haven’t been removed for the past 10 days.
- Amy
- Amber Bailey’s fat, old cat, who is currently 20 years old.
- Betsy, Lily Donato’s cat.
- George, Kevin Corrigan’s mom’s cat. (This one is mine!)
- Madeleine, Clarissa’s deceased cat
- Fritz, Juliette’s stupidest cat alive
- Oscar, the chillest cat ever.
- Pickles, A really sweet cat who lives at someones Grandma’s house and almost died of a respiratory infection.
- Richard
- Tabatha (Tabby), Matthew and Deborah Durkin’s cat.
- Roxie, a black and white tuxedo cat that pukes every time she eats, but she still manages to weigh twenty pounds.
Here’s the thing: The list of cats isn’t complete. There are only 67 cats on it. There are way more cats than that in the world. If we ever want it to be a list of every cat, then you need to add yours. If you have a cat or know of a cat you should add it’s name and a short description right now. And keep it factual, we’re trying to add knowledge to the world.
One more time, the link is List of Cats.
December 2, 2011
October 3, 2011
Hey guys, we’re excited to announce that after months of planning in our top secret lair, we’ve just launched a brand new, big sister site called “Jest.”
Jest is your new source the best of everything funny on the web: TV episodes, stand up, original videos, sketch comedy, parodies, music videos, pranks, bloopers, and more. Everything from your favorite episodes of Louie to Rick Perry’s Bad Lip Reading.
We made a new Web site. I hope you like it.
RSS feed: http://kevincorrigan.tumblr.com/rss
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