I’m reading about bath salts for a sketch I’m writing. I’ve noticed that, in reviews, people refer to tripping on bath salts as taking a bath. These are my seven favorite real quotes from real bath salt reviews.

1. The euphoric effects begin pretty darn quick – say 10-15 minutes and escalate from there to produce one of the best baths on the planet, hands down.
2. “You will be able to sleep 8+ hours after your bath and will have only mild effects the day after.”
3. “The effects of Tranquility bath salts do not last as long as many of the others either, which is a plus for many people that don’t have a budget of 6-8 hours for a bath.”
4. “We can also attest to an extreme state of clear-mindedness and ability to focus, if that is something that you wish to do while bathing.”
5. “…with little in the way of after-effects, at least none that would make you want to forgo another bath sometime in the future.”
6. “If not experienced, definitely start out with a little bit in the bath and see how things go.”
7. “Just because it’s 50-State legal, doesn’t mean it’s a crappy bath.”